Writing about Phnom Penh

If you’ve been reading the posts on this blog from the few weeks, you might have noticed that the majority of the posts were about the places I visited during the one full-day we had to do a day trip in Phnom Penh, Cambodia during my trip to several Southeast Asian countries with my cousin about a year ago. The reason why we included Phnom Penh in our itinerary in Cambodia was to learn about the country’s history. We did accomplish that, but what I personally didn’t expect was the impact it had on me after the trip was long over. So, before continuing on with more blog posts from other places we visited during this Southeast Asian trip, I thought I’d write a little bit about my experience remembering, processing, and reflecting about this one day visit to Phnom Penh.

A travel writer named Dave Fox wrote in a book called Globejotting about the meaning of the word souvenir as a remembrance (or something to remember an experience with). Coming into this trip, I had an objective of creating a photojournal about the trip that I could use to tell the story about my experience as I visited places and experienced the culture. So, during this trip, in addition to taking photos, I also took short notes using my Blackberry so I would remember the interesting details I learned from the visit or those that are important to remember (like the names of the people we met).

When I got back home in the United States and worked on the photojournal, the short notes were very helpful in remembering the details of the trip, as without it, I would’ve mixed up many details that were somewhat similar between places we visited (e.g., there is a wall with ramakien frescoes at the Grand Palace in Bangkok, and there is a similar looking wall with ramaketi frescoes at the Royal Palace in Phnom Penh). The one photojournal I wanted to create ended up to be too big to have as one album, so it ended up getting split up by cities that we visited. I was quite happy with this souvenir once it was done (around 600 photos divided into eight albums), but as I went through the process of putting together the captions to go with the photos, I realized that while a photograph may ‘speak a thousand words’ there are some things that it cannot convey (e.g., feelings, thoughts). So then I thought may be it would be an interesting exercise to take the short notes and the photos (including the thousands that didn’t quite make the cut for the photojournals) and retrace my steps during the trip and recount the experience in writing.

There is a site called TravelBlog that is similar to WordPress as a blogging site, but it’s specifically oriented towards travels (e.g., it’s indexed by travel locations). A lot of people use it to blog as they travel to provide a nice update to people they know who want to follow their journey as it happens (very nice especially for folks who are doing epic journeys like the Round the World travels). In my case, I didn’t use it during my actual travel, but I thought it would still be nice to write entries about my daily experiences during the trip after the fact.

I started writing the entries, and it went fine until I reached the day in Phnom Penh. The challenge with this one day is because of the emotional nature of the experience, and recounting the horror seen at Tuol Sleng and Choeung Ek was very difficult. If you go to TravelBlog and read entries from people who visited these places in Phnom Penh, the majority of them would either simply post photos they took there, or only summarize their experiences with words like ‘sad’, ‘angry’, ‘depressing’, or ‘appalling’. If you know even only a little bit about these places and their role in the Khmer Rouge genocide, those are the right words to describe these, but someone reading the story wouldn’t necessarily know much or learn about it beyond that. So rather than simply doing the same thing, I tried to write down more descriptively what I saw and experienced there, and added relevant facts around it so even those who had not heard of the Khmer Rouge atrocities (like I was prior to the trip) would at least take away something after reading it.

The process of writing the ‘one day travel entry’ for Phnom Penh ended up taking me almost three months to do. I could picture the experience very clearly in my head, but it was very difficult at times to find motivation to sit down and put those in writing, especially when it’s difficult to find words to express what I felt about it. In some cases, I ended up browsing through sites on the Internet to learn more about the historical aspects of this and the impacts it had on people, rather than writing the entry itself. It also caused me to reflect on what I think and believe about some very difficult topics that the Cambodian people had to struggle through, such as the idea of forgiveness and retribution, and how to deal with hardships.

In the end, I did manage to finish writing about that one day in Phnom Penh, and in the last few weeks, the posts in this blog, especially those that are related to Tuol Sleng and Choeung Ek, were largely based on what I wrote last year.

The photo below was one that I ended up selecting as the cover photo for my photojournal on Phnom Penh in flickr. It’s the memorial stupa at Choeung Ek that from far away it looked quite majestic, and served as a wonderful way to honor the victims at this site (it housed the remains of the victims found in the nearby mass graves).

Memorial Stupa

Romdeng

We got back to our hotel around 4 pm after our day trip in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. It’s still too early to go for dinner, and we were exhausted mentally and emotionally after the day’s experience. So we decided to spend a couple of hours to rest and take it easy for the rest of the day.

For dinner, we decided to go to a restaurant called Romdeng. The restaurant was highly-rated for its authentic Khmer food. It was also unique as it served as a training restaurant run by an NGO to help street kids learning skills to work in hospitality / restaurant business.

Just like the previous night, we went outside our hotel to get a tuk-tuk to take us to the restaurant. The tuk-tuk driver from the previous night was not there, but there was another driver waiting for passengers out there. This time I discussed the price for the ride with the driver ahead of time.

The restaurant was only about 15-minute tuk-tuk ride from our hotel. On the way we got to see more of the night life in Phnom Penh. There were local street-side restaurants everywhere, similar to Bangkok and Jakarta. Romdeng itself was situated on a side street. The restaurant was housed in a big, old house. There were some tables outdoors under the trees, and there were some indoors in air-conditioned rooms. We were seated inside, and the ambience was pretty nice. The walls were decorated with artwork made by some of the students that the same NGO supported.

Since Romdeng was a training restaurant, the service was quite interesting. We had several people taking turns serving our table; the servers were mostly students who came with their teachers to our table. The students would do most of the work while their teachers observing their work. At times the students were not sure on how to respond to the customer’s request, so they would ask their teachers to help. At our table, the students did very good job in serving us. I could tell that some were being extra careful in doing their job as they knew their teachers were watching.

The food at Romdeng was very good. One particular dish that was popular among the foreigners who dined at Romdeng was a local delicacy that might be too extreme to try for many: the deep-fried tarantula appetizer. Cambodians started eating this out of necessity during the hard times, but over time it became a delicacy. We decided to give it a try. It turned out that it tasted not as bad as it looked. It tasted like eating chicken liver. It was cooked similar to Indonesian way of deep frying chicken liver and gizzard, with turmeric, coriander, and soy sauce to spice it up. So after the first bite, it wasn’t really that bad or scary for us.

We also had a refreshing salad dish and a fresh water fish dish. Both dishes were good. To close, we ordered a couple of desserts, a rice flour and turmeric crepe with caramelized banana filling and coconut gelato topping, and banana-filled rice dumplings with palm sugar syrup. The crepe was a great ‘east meet west’ dish. The rice balls were good as well, but they were too filling to have after the meal.

As we paid for our bill, we were asked to fill a survey to rate our dining experience. I thought that was a good way to provide feedback to the program. Judging from our own experience and the other patrons at nearby tables, I think everyone was satisfied with their dining experience. I know personally I would definitely come back to Romdeng the next time I’m in Phnom Penh again.

The photo below was taken as we’re about to try the first dish delivered to our table… the aforementioned deep-fried tarantula appetizer. As you can see, it’s presented quite nicely, though you can still tell those are tarantulas that we’re about to eat.

Deep-fried tarantula

Driving Around Phnom Penh

The visit to Choeung Ek was the last item on our itinerary for the day trip in Phnom Penh. It was still midafternoon when we were done with our Choeung Ek visit; apparently even though it was a very intense day emotionally and intellectually, we didn’t really spend a long time at each of our destination. Since our driver was available to take us around for the rest of the afternoon, I asked him to drive us around downtown Phnom Penh when we got back to the city. We had not been to the river front area yet, so I thought it would be nice to at least drive past the area to see the part of Phnom Penh that’s usually considered as the popular destination for the foreign tourists.

As we reached the river front area, our driver took us to an area called the Diamond Island. It’s a newly developed area where you could see many new real estate developments in the city. There was a huge convention hall that had been built there. Not far from there, a huge casino called Nagaworld was opened several years back, and it’s billed as one of the largest casinos in Southeast Asia.

As we were about to leave the Diamond Island, our driver brought our attention to a bridge that we’re about to pass. This bridge was the scene where less than two months before our visit a stampede happened during the Water Festival celebration there, and 395 people died on that bridge. A tragedy that you wish didn’t have to hit a nation that had endured so much. But life moved on — we wouldn’t know that was the site of the tragedy if our driver had not told us.

The area near the river front (Sisowath Quay) was pretty much like what we expected. It was a very dense area, full of choices of services for tourists. There were shops, restaurants, and lodging options for pretty much any budget level. It reminded me somewhat to the Khao San Road area in Bangkok – the main destination for tourists to go especially as the ‘happening place’ to meet other foreign tourists.

We also drove past the Wat Phnom area. Wat Phnom was a temple on the only hill in Phnom Penh area. Legend has it that this was the place where Lady Penh established a temple on top of the hill (thus, the city was named Phnom Penh — Penh’s hill). Our driver asked if we would like to stop there to visit the temple. We were already pretty tired, so we passed on the offer and asked to go back to the hotel instead.

The photo below was taken from our car as we drove through the Diamond Island and about to pass the bridge where Water Festival stampede tragedy happened. As you can see, life went on and it all looked normal.

Water festival stampede bridge

Khmer Rouge Tribunal

After finishing our tour of Choeung Ek and thanking our guide Mr. Chanteng for guiding us, we checked out a small museum on the Choeung Ek grounds that had more display to educate the visitors about the Khmer Rouge atrocities. In the museum, they had a display showing a sampling of tools that the Khmer Rouge used to kill people. There was also an exhibit showing the organization structure of the Khmer Rouge leadership, and some information about the Khmer Rouge tribunal that was still ongoing to put the ex Khmer Rouge leaders on trial for crime against humanity. It’s been more than 30 years since the end of the Khmer Rouge reign, but the tribunal process was still going on.

The tribunal process only put the leadership of Khmer Rouge on trial. The other ex-Khmer Rouge members were re-integrated into the Cambodian society as the organization was disbanded. I asked Mr. Chanteng how people dealt with this. He said most people didn’t really discuss much about it and moved on, so over time you wouldn’t be able to distinguish those who were part of Khmer Rouge in the past anymore. I also asked him if people thought these ex-Khmer Rouge cadres should also be punished for their role in the past atrocities. He said it’s not an easy decision to make, as many of the ex-Khmer Rouge cadres were young, uneducated people who were brainwashed by those in Khmer Rouge leadership, and many joined the Khmer Rouge out of need for survival (either they followed, or they would die themselves). So, the common position is to put the blame on the leaders, and let the others go.

The tribunal process had been going on for several years and had cost more than USD$70 million, and only recently (July 2010) it yielded one guilty verdict (on Duch, the head of Tuol Sleng Prison, who admitted his guilt and was sentenced for 35 years in prison — considered inadequate sentence by many Cambodians). There were five more Khmer Rouge leaders currently waiting for trials — they were already in their 80s in 2010. Some people questioned whether the tribunal was worth doing, given that the large of money spent ended up consumed by a corrupt administration. In the meantime, many of the victims, the Cambodian people, still lived in poverty. Many suggested that the money would be better spent if used to build infrastructure in the country. Again, this was another difficult question that the Cambodians had to wrestle with.

After we’re done checking out the exhibits at the museum, we spent a little bit of time resting outside the museum before we left Choeung Ek. As we sat there, we saw in the distance the tall memorial stupa and a Cambodian flag flying next to it. It felt quite peaceful at that moment — I think it’s a good symbol for what the Cambodians hoped for the future: a peaceful and prosperous Cambodian society that doesn’t forget its past to ensure that the dark history will not be repeated again.

I saw the photo below at the museum in Choeung Ek. It’s a photo taken of Duch during the initial trial that’s mentioned above. One interesting development that happened since then (early this month, February 2012) was that he appealed the conviction under the arguments that he’s only following orders from those above him, but in a surprising turn of events, the appeal was denied, and instead his sentence was changed to life in prison instead.

Duch trial

Mass Graves

After spending few minutes at the memorial stupa at the Choeung Ek Genocidal Center outside Phnom Penh, Cambodia, we followed our guide Mr. Chanteng on a walking tour around the area. Without knowing the story, all you would see around the memorial stupa was what looked like an undeveloped plot of land, covered with grassy areas and some trees around. In the distance, you could also see a river flowing. If you look closer, you would notice that the grassy areas were not flat, but seemed to mounds created after large holes were dug on the ground. That would be the first clue for the horrific events that happened at this place.

Before the Khmer Rouge came into power, the Choeung Ek area was a small village about 15 km southwest of the city of Phnom Penh. The land that became the Killing Field was an old Chinese cemetery near a river. The Khmer Rouge regime decided to use this area as the place where they would exterminate the prisoners from Tuol Sleng because it would allow them to do it in secret and in a place where they could hide the evidence. Most Cambodians were of Chinese descendants, and Chinese typically would bury their dead in a family cemetery. So by burying the killed prisoners at the cemetery ground, no one would find out about the atrocities that took place. Mr. Chanteng showed us some remains of Chinese grave stones that gave us an idea of what it was like there before the place became the Killing Field.

As we walked through the dirt paths, Mr. Chanteng pointed to spots on the ground where we could see what looked like pieces of clothing, and as we looked closer, we could also notice bone and teeth fragments. These were from remains from victims in the mass graves that had not been exhumed yet. During the rainy seasons, heavy rains and floods in the area would bring some of these remains up to the ground surface. In the first few years after the Killing Field was discovered, the river nearby would flood the area during the rainy season. People who lived nearby said that during the first few years, you could smell very bad odor of decaying corpses in the air around the area. That’s just hard to imagine.. Since then, a dam was built near the river to prevent flooding from happening, but the heavy rains would still bring some of these remains up to the surface. It’s yet another surreal experience thinking that we were literally walking among the deads there.

There were several distinct spots at Choeung Ek that were marked to give the visitors idea of what happened there. Most of the mass graves were not marked, except some that had some significance due to what’s found in the grave. One grave was marked as the one with the largest number of victims found, 450 of them. Another one was marked because the victims found in the grave did not have heads, suggesting that they were beheaded before buried there. Another mass grave had only women and children victims, and some of the victims did not have clothes on.

One sign marked the spot where the trucks carrying the prisoners from Tuol Sleng would stop and had the prisoners unloaded. The prisoners were then taken to the place where they would be executed, and some would have to first dig their own mass grave before they were executed. There was a sign marking the place where a shed once stood. It was used to store DDT and some other chemicals. The chemicals were used after the execution had taken place; by pouring the chemicals on the bodies in a mass grave, the smell of decomposing corpse could be masked, and if there were any of the prisoners who were still alive, the chemicals would certainly kill them.

One spot probably summed up the cruelty of the Khmer Rouge the best: a tree named ‘the killing tree.’ It looked like just any other trees in the area, but this particular tree was significant because it was used to kill children and babies. The Khmer Rouge soldiers would take children and babies they wanted to kill there and smashed their heads onto the tree until they died. It was hard to imagine that people could be so cruel, especially to those as helpless as children and babies.

Before we finished our walking tour, I asked Mr. Chanteng about how he was personally impacted by the Khmer Rouge regime. He told us story about what his family went through in the late 1970s. Like many other Cambodians, his family had to leave their village to move to a different part of Cambodia to work on rice fields. At that time, he was only three years old, too young to move, so he was left with his old grandparents in his village as his parents and his two older sisters left for another part of the country. Sometime during the move, his parents survived, but unfortunately his two older sisters did not make it. They died of starvation.

I asked him how he and others in Cambodia could move on with their lives after the horrific past. He said for him, he wanted to make sure people learned about the Khmer Rouge atrocities so it would not happen again in the future. That’s why he became a guide at Choeung Ek – a job he had been doing for more than ten years. He also said that for many Cambodians, it was such a hurtful past that they chose to just not talk about it. Thirty years later, the majority of Cambodians (70-80 percent of the population) were born after the Khmer Rouge time, so they did not experience the horror first hand. They knew that it happened and impacted their parents, but many chose to not talk about it because it’s just too sad of history to discuss. It’s a very difficult situation that these Cambodians had to endure to move on with their lives. We could just hope that whichever path they took to deal with it, the horror of Khmer Rouge atrocities would never happen again.

The photo below was a black-and-white photo we saw at Tuol Sleng Museum. It was a photo taken when the mass graves were uncovered at Choeung Ek after the Khmer Rouge regime’s reign was over.

Mass graves uncovered